My own private library

I should have put it in my own albion but I don't have any impulse to update it anymore. So i put it here, when i still remember, still bother. Well, i may update it to my site one day, who knows, but not now. The site was dedicated to that one and only band. Yes, i'm still fond of its subsequent subdivisions but nothing compare to the east london pub band, and frankly I even do not want them to reunion. Time cannot be turned back to 2002 which i consider as their heyday - bound by intense love, ideas and songs, lived in poverty and poetry, typical bohemian, absolute beautiful. The band shall stay intact in my heart (no matter what the subdivisions become) and my site shall accordingly also stay intact on the net (series of pretext for my own laziness).

The shambolic minstrel (or scoundrel some may say) is extra-ordinarily well-read. There are numerous cultural, geographical or literature references in the song titles, or it's pure coincidence, am i just thinking too much?

A Fool There Was - a film starring the mysterious Theda Bara, story of femme fatale, how a decent moral man got corrupted by a dangerous woman and err... took his road to ruin. The film was actually based on a play by Porter Emerson Browne.

Charming Theda Bara in A Fool There Was

A'Rebours - Against Nature, by J. K. Huysmans

Albion - Blake's painting of Albion

Albion as England - A Little Boy Lost, again, by William Blake, Curse of Minerva by Lord Byron and ... err England Is Mine: Pop Life In Albion from Wilde to Goldie by Michael Bracewell

Arbeit Macht Frei - Work is Freedom

Arcady - Eclogues by Virgil

Back From The Dead - it's a horror film! (well, you know it just by the name)

Boys In The Band - The Boys In the Band, gay film in 1970 (very indicative)


Killamangiro - kill a man for giro, well, everyone knows it, but why did he put the words together? I wonder if it's because of the highest mountain in Africa. Mountain Kilimanjaro, ha!


Lady Don't Fall Backwards - by Joan Le Mesurier. Joan Le Mesurier was the wife of actor John Le Mesurier, best friend of Tony Hancock and ... (very complicated) Joan and Hancock had an affair but John forgave them both ...
...err, actually, it first appeared in here:



a book written by Darcy Sarto? ha!


Love On The Dole - by Walter Greenwood

Lust Of The Libertines - by The Marquis de Sade

Mocking Bird - obviously, To Kill A Mockingbird, by Harper Lee

My Darling Clementine - a Western film starring Henry Fonda

Radio America - probably you'll never hear any The Libertines on this station

Road To Ruin - by Ramones

Sally Brown - no need to be introduced

I like her brother Charlie more cos' he's the natural born loser like me

Tell The King - "Tell the king the sky is falling!" well, two of my most favourite bands made reference to the old english fable

That Bowery Song - The Bowery of NYC (where he met the dealer, brought him to hotel room, being late to the gig and things started to turn sour)

The Boy Looked at Johnny - by Julie Burchill and Tony Parsons

Hey, it's johnny rotten, of course not johnny borrell!

The Ha Ha Wall - the hidden wall to divide places. These walls are invisible from the house to ensure a beautiful garden view. These walls are not funny, ha-ha is just the exclamation of people who discovered those walls.

The Man Who Would Be King - by Rudyard Kipling

Through The Looking Glass - by Lewis Carroll

Vertigo -

a film by Hitchcock, or the record label?

What Katie Did - What Katy Did by Susan Coolidge. The song of course has nothing to do with this children's book. I think the song has made more reference to There She Goes by The La's.

What Became Of The Likely Lads - Whatever Happened To The Likely Lads, that's The Likely Lads series in the 70's, you may still find it in hmv.

*Edit on 27 Mar 2007:
I've just read this week nme, oh, what a coincidence! It talks about reference behind songs, err, of course mine is more complete than that hype champion magazine (smug again^^) But yes, i have to add : The Narcissist - by ancient Greek myth and Picture of Dorian Gray by Wilde

staleness

Should I opt for normality or perversity sobriety or insanity things get difficult when normality and perversity are all within this f__king banality

12 march became so special since i've known you

happy birthday to you
happy birthday to you
happy birthday happy birthday
happy birthday to you

i blow out the candles, make the wish
eat the cake on your behalf
this day should be filled with love and friendship
poetry, kisses and hug.

happy birthday, stranger
happy birthday, dear

My Plug-in Baby

3 march 2007 - Muse Live @ Asia-World Expo, Hong Kong

Supermassive Black Hole?
No, it's supermassive karaoke.
From the 1st to the last, even if i couldn't remember the name of the tracks, i could still sing along (and re-create the lyrics instantly), so u know how many hit songs muse have, or it just reminded me how i used to love them (too many lovers, err... i mean too many favourite bands, too little time, i sometimes forgot some of my love)


army of muse, also massive


oh how matt bellamy looks like brett anderson


the dark prince

What is your number?

Mine is 4.

A thursday's child.
The fourth of the four children.
Type 4 of Enneagram.

My sister was so excited about that programme of Enneagram on tvb last Sunday. She revealed that she once had taken a course to analyse herself and she was the Perfectionist Type One. No wonder. Dogmatic, self-righteous, condemnatory and quick to find fault of others, i know she's "the One" even if she didn't tell me.

Generally (or I don't know if it's just me), we are surrounded by :

Type One (aka Reformer/Perfectionist), for their principled, orderly and self-disciplined, they always perform well in their career and they are always your bosses;

Type Three (aka Motivator), pragmatic, adaptable, ambitious, image-conscious, they are always your colleagues who are the bloody attention-seekers but your boss likes them anyway; and

Type Six (aka Loyalist), stable, conformist and defensive, they are always your faceless colleagues;

Type Eight (aka Leader), self-explanatory, this must be your big boss, self-confident, decisive, ruthless, dictatorial;

Type Two (aka Helper), self-explanatory, kind, caring, generous, I think my mother, your mother, everyone's mother is Type Two ... oh mother, you are so manipulative and possessive and stifled me in the name of love.

Other types which I don't always come across:

Type Seven (aka Generalist), what is generalist? all-round person? they are enthusiastic, extroverted, joyous and search for new experience, should be a fun person but sadly, most people I know are those crashing bores Type 1, 3, and 8 or the depressive low life like me.

Type Nine (aka Peacemaker), friendly and accepting, but sometimes passive and repressed. The people I know mostly are aggressive and cantankerous, i can hardly remember any peacemaker in my life.

Meeeself, I read a lot about Enneagram a few years ago for I felt so confused in my career life. Doing numerous tests, no change of result. I am the hopeless Type 4 with the wing of Type 5. I scored zero or even negative in Type 8 and Type 1 (these two Types have the most successful career, so u know how disastrous my career life was/is). Type 4, aka the Romantic. Type 5, aka the Thinker. I won't boast of the attractive traits of these two Types cos' I have none, but I probably have all the weaknesses (how unhealthy). Misfit, outcast, impractical, unproductive, evasive, reclusive, isolated, eccentric, abuse in alcohol and drugs, suicidal.

Enneagram is quite accurate in my two pennies.
Simple test

Wish You Were Here

Dark Side of the Moon, the album which I was forced to listen when I was just three or four years old, for my brother used to scare me by the heartbeat sound and the strange man laughing therein. This was a Japanese Release with the chinese words "狂氣" on the side note of the vinyl. As a kid of course i feel so nervous of the band I thought was called 狂氣. When I grew up, this scary album becomes one of my all time favourite (and i will never return this vinyl to the owner cos' i believe it must be worth a bit now).

Dark Side of the Moon Tour, probably the event once in a lifetime. It doesn't matter if you call it a Pink Floyd live or just Roger Waters. It's the music that matters. But if you have to compare the Pink Floyd led by Gilmour minus Waters and the Pink Floyd with only Waters, (I actually shouldn't make the comparison cos' I only saw the former in the Pulse) I feel the performance of the latter is more poignant and direct. It's stunning to feel/watch the whole set of Dark Side of the Moon, but my favourite moment was Shine On You Crazy Diamond - the emotion was actually too much to bear when you heard the lyrics with the image of Syd Barrett. Of course the set of The Wall was impressively nihilistic. From teenagers to some 50 something middle age group, all shouted that you-know-what anti-establishment slogan. It's almost ecstatic and euphoric. As a human we all love to rebel and destroy.


The pig does fly - 你可以重寫歷史,但不能改變它


"Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way" oh yeah, that's why I think I'm quite English


There is no dark side of the moon really. Matter of fact it's all dark.


The child is grown, The dream is gone.


Roger, an old man now


you painter, you piper, you prisoner


Requiem for syd

My own Proust's experience

Like a lightning in the dark, memories always catch you in a most
unprepared way, skip before you grasp. That is why people honoured memories as Ghosts, it's not you found them, it's they who caught and haunted you.

I walked to the pier humming that tune again, felt so frustrated as I couldn't remember the name. The only thing I know is that I used to love the song. Frustration symptoms lasted for a few days when I walked passed the pier until the ghost revealed itself. The song was called Love Letters. (phew, i don't believe i fall for that sin of banality, so it's definitely not the spell/curse of February 14). Rushed back to home to dig out the soundtrack of Blue Velvet.

A few notes of music bring the overwhelming impression of the past. I was shocked I forgot how pretty Isabella Roasellini and Kyle MacLachlan were, I was shocked I forgot the beauty of the film, violence blend with tenderness (typical David Lynch), I was shocked the film was released in 1986. Maybe I just feel a bit melancholic for the time passed.

In 1986, where were you? what were you doing? I was too young to go to see this category III film in cinema, but I was definitely shaped by abundant abnormal aesthetics.

give me more MAdnEss

sO eNougH meDIA hYpe for KLAXONS. bUT i must say HOw i adore their offical dEbTe album. "*** MyThS*** is SITTing On The BIG chAIr aT NumBEr ///////// O.N.E" it's not R,i,D,i,C,u.l.O,u.s at all. t
urn the volume to the maximum, finding tranquility in the sheer frenzy


klaxons - Myths of the Near Future

Busy without cause

Isn't that we call it 無事忙? My chinese is so bad that I may misunderstand the true meaning.

Busy for family issue, i'm not going to let all to see the wounds here but i do feel tired and sometimes disgusting, i want to disappear in somewhere unknown (but then i will be very irresponsible, u know, blood is fucking thicker than water so and so).

I was thinking about money recently. I am the person who is indifferent to it (am I being pretentious or ignorant to the fact) anyway that's what I think what I am but my stand was being challenged and ...

Yes, I am looking for a new job with better pay. Actually I do not know what is the standard "price" for a lawyer. "Your request is too low, you can request the double of your salary" haha, is it true or what? That's come from one of those big corporation... but i really do not like their attitude of "make your office as your battlefield everyday". used to be lazy and mediocre, I think I should be content with living in poverty while being lazy.

Routine work:
It's not a bad job(?), i think some people may even love my job, if you are a canton-pop lover. Licensee meeting, greetings and awards-giving, the chick of my department kept urging me to take photos of justin and leon koo, phew~ I'd rather shooting the cute birds.


Girl J(2)


Girl J(1)


Girl F


Band Z (let's clap for Vocals Chou for his having a red tonic, actually feel shit about it - no! I believe I'm the first to have it in Hong Kong, i've never wore it, now everyone have it, i know i'm idiotic to think this way)

Angels

They were so sweet.


J'aime ce bebe.

Picnic by the motorway, not

Taking the de botton's lesson again in the time of broke, let's go to the lavender garden near my home!

Well my home is actually very close to the border, I think it only takes about 30 minutes to Shenzhen, much closer than my office in Central. Anyone who knows me well must feel sad for me - for I've got a serious phobia for the middle kingdom (ok no political talk here). Don't feel bad for me, cos' the proximity to the border has no relation to the "feel" of this place. Comparatively speaking, it is one of the sparsely populated area in Hong Kong, which i feel so great as an autistic person. With assistance of a little bit imagination, I have a little tour to the lavender field in Hokkaido or even Provence (Paranoia!)


something looked like lavender


a bee drowned in the flower


idling all the day, so u want to be a cat or a human being?

Fitter, healthier and more ...

First post of 2007. I wish everyone safe and minted.

New year resolution. Why do we have to think about it in every January?

Learn a foreign language, read more books, change the job .... the list goes on. That reminds me of the plan for summer holidays when I was very young (and only at that age I tried to be good and pleasant). I used to draw up plans for my summer holidays and thought that I could finish all homework within the first week and then go fulfilling the plan (and the plan was, like others' new year resolution - learn swimming, learn a foreign language, practise drawing and calligraphy (ha, it's true, I once wrote down drawing and writing in my plan, hopeless)...). Well, plan was made just to show how it fell through. Every summer holidays, I just idled away and could only finish the homework at the last day of the holidays. I hate to plan now. It just strengthens the sense of failure. So, look at my New Year's Resolution of 2006, I couldn't achieve any, that's no surprise.

I decide to make the easier ones (or I should say the ones that please me most):

1. Drink more.
2. Take more _________.
3. Go to A again. (2 & 3 maybe corelated)

Look back in anger

2006, what a year! With disgust and a strong urge to escape.
Let me plagiarise some words from one of my favourite bloggers in his douban, "there is nothing worse than death, except to live". I feel it at heart.
To live, is to fulfil your obligations, or
in fact, living (survival/mere existence) is your primary obligation, albeit if there is any aim or meaning to it. I don't feel suicidal, any talk of suicide is old-fashioned and cliche nowadays. Asphyxiated? definitely. "Man was born free but was everywhere in chain". who said this? Rousseau or Voltaire? That is what I learnt in my a-level History class, I think it's true.

Well, i just want to write down my most favourite cds in 2006, but turn to be a paragraph of grumbling.

1. Funfairs & Heartbreak - Special Needs
This posthumous album of the Needs is what I need this year. A bunch of perfect pop songs, blue skies and winter gardens - that what makes me carry on, still humming "I'm not afraid, to fall and fall, I asked no miracles, at the curtain call".

2. I Killed the Zeitgeist - Nicky Wire
I maybe the only person who ranks this album so high. Misanthropist and withdrawn, this is Nicky, or this is me? "Do you know you could die from a broken heart?"

3. The Eraser - Thom Yorke
Another misanthropist and withdrawn person, so? thom yorke is always like my soulmate, knows exactly what i feel. "And this is fucked up, fucked up, this your blind spot, blind spot, it should be obvious, but it's not."

4. First Impressions of Earth - The Strokes
The first dark album i got from 2006, still lingers on my player.

5. Waterloo to Anywhere - Dirty Pretty Things
I actually do not know if I think this album is that good to be my no.5, but for my personal preference for mr barat... though he always remains his gentleman's silence, i think mr. barat is quite bitchy is this album, maybe that's the reason I love it.

6. The Freedom Spark - Larrikin Love
Don't need to say much about this album, the title speaks it all. Think all the caged soul like me love this album dearly. "It's time we told the story of how the soul grows old, and how a young boy grows up in a world that's cold".

7. The Great Western - James Dean Bradfield
Yes, I love James, everyone knows.

8. We Are the Pipettes - The Pipettes
They are hyped up, untalented, dress in ridiculous polka dot...but they are fabulous. This album is kind of illumination to my boring life, how i danced in my mind when i was just jam-packed in the train and listened to Pull Shape.

9. The Secret of the Loveninjas - Loveninjas
I must have missed so much good stuff for the swedish pop music. Actually I love their EPs more, but this album is not bad, sweet and pop, thanks to Labrador.

10. Jarvis - Jarvis Cocker or
Ringleader of The Tormentors - Morrissey
Oh I can't decide.

If Bumfest sessions of Babyshambles is an official release album, of course it must be at a very top ranking... and if The Blinding is not an ep, maybe i will place it somewhere within my top 10, but.. I really hate to listen the new I Love You But You're Green.

Death of Internet

Almost the death of me, mentally
Life becomes
Void and empty
Or that is what life is.

That suddenly reminds me of the film matrix, life seems so normal and fulfilled inside the matrix, but of course the fact is just opposite.

Christmas thought

I could have been someone
Well so could anyone
You took my dreams from me
When I first found you
I kept them with me babe
I put them with my own
Can't make it all alone
I've built my dreams around you

Take me by the hand now, Waterloo to anywhere

So where the story begins
or in fact there's no beginning and no end

should i take you back to paddington

Paddington revisited, my dorm


The little garden below

or to the eternal garden of delight


112a Teedale Street, London

Take the train! Follow my own gypsie lane
this is the land where the noble spirits rest
though bleak and blizzard,
with the language I can hardly communicate
i am asking "if i can stay"

well, I was lost in this vanity and liberty


It's so bleak, so pretty


Any fool believes that love can be found at Pont-Neuf?


Lamps in front of musee du louvre


Art or luxury? musee d'orsay


I'm trying to copy a photomaster's masterpiece, with low quality


Metro Abbesses


Spining heavyhorse


I reckon these are the most romantic stairs in the world, yes, I wanted to slide down the banister if I was not that clumsy


Thousand steps for the deliverance, basilique du sacre coeur


It's so blinding


Beautiful Montmartre


That's the beginning, that's the end, anywhere in Albion

Two men, one soul

Are you still shaking out all dead wood from your bed
Live @ Brixton, London 4 December 2006

This was my third time this year to watch Dirty Pretty Things, how time and space matches each other, and of course I do like this band. Brixton was not a good venue, maybe I never like any big one. Wince not, I was compensated by the choice of songs. Glad to hear One To My Left, my most favourite b-side of dpt at the moment, and the unforgetable The Good Old Days (yes how can we forget the good old days). Gin & Milk was played extremely fast and smooth (and that's the best version I've ever heard). Lighting ciggies for Stan, you know mr barat has shaken out his dead wood, he with Stan are a perfect couple now. My only complaint (besides the venue) was, Carl didn't take off his clothes! Isn't all dpt gig a saucy indie boys strip show??! No, no disrespect here, but I must admit my liking for seeing mr. barat's naked body (albeit a bit chubby now).


That white strap looks like a bra strap

Now the wood is all dead, but you still smile like a child
Live @ Apollo Theatre, London 7 December 2006

"What's it really like now it's been a long long time since I've step outside .." Yes, it was indeed such a long time since I last saw Babyshambles. The history of mr doherty did discourage me to make any overseas booking. Call it a summons or spell (or curse), I took the risk. In fact the decision to go to uk again was all because of Babyshambles. I really miss this band (or the person to be exactly). Hate to see all tabloid news of Peter (it was a bit crazy, for my short stay in uk, I could find his news everyday in such tabloid), hate to meet all idiotic fans just love this tacky cliche of sex-drug-rockn'roll-oh-it's-so-cool, it all belittles this band and this man. My belief proves true, my loyalty pays off. Babyshambles was absolutely brilliant, yeah, they could be messy and shambolic (and it's no stranger to me, or even go absence), but when they show their true colour, all you feel is joy and bathing in the arcadian bliss (can anyone feel that i am going to be oblivious and insane now, i can't stop praising them). I am not exaggerated to say that when I saw their gig, I couldn't stop to think how their lyrics "So here comes the delivery, straight from the heart of misery" was so true and appropriate. Sorry I couldn't remember exactly the setlists, but the highlight (for me) was (it's all so predictable) sedative, you talk, fuck forever, what katie did, albion and of course time for heroes.


Great, there was only one song with The General

Sometimes I feel so strange that no matter how shambolic and druggy Babyshambles are, I still feel the joy, angelic and the childish care-free of their music, just like no matter how decent and gentle Dirty Pretty Things are (don't say clean, they are not), I still feel the demons, frustration and heaviness of their music. Two sides of the arcady.

Here I fucking go .... the albionsolution

"let's call it a day" I told myself
but my soul was caught again
in the most unprepared way
think it's the last
but back to the start

I messed my head

The more that you follow me
The more I get lost
You think that you know me
You're pissing me off
You said that you love me
why don't you fuck off?
You think that you own me
You're ripping me off

Enivrez-Vous

That is one of my most favourite poems. I feel so ecstatic to hear it recited by you.

Il faut être toujours ivre.
Tout est là:
c'est l'unique question.
Pour ne pas sentir
l'horrible fardeau du Temps
qui brise vos épaules
et vous penche vers la terre,
il faut vous enivrer sans trêve.
Mais de quoi?
De vin, de poésie, ou de vertu, à votre guise.
Mais enivrez-vous.
Et si quelquefois,
sur les marches d'un palais,
sur l'herbe verte d'un fossé,
dans la solitude morne de votre chambre,
vous vous réveillez,
l'ivresse déjà diminuée ou disparue,
demandez au vent,
à la vague,
à l'étoile,
à l'oiseau,
à l'horloge,
à tout ce qui fuit,
à tout ce qui gémit,
à tout ce qui roule,
à tout ce qui chante,
à tout ce qui parle,
demandez quelle heure il est;
et le vent,
la vague,
l'étoile,
l'oiseau,
l'horloge,
vous répondront:
"Il est l'heure de s'enivrer!
Pour n'être pas les esclaves martyrisés du Temps,
enivrez-vous;
enivrez-vous sans cesse!
De vin, de poésie ou de vertu, à votre guise."

-- Charles Baudelaire

There are many translated version. Not many of them are satisfying. I like the below version (with some of my amendments):

Always be drunk.
That's it:
That the only question!
In order not to feel
Time's horrid burden
bruise your shoulders,
grinding you into the earth,
Get drunk and stay that way.
On what?
On wine, poetry, virtue, as you like.
But get drunk.
And if you sometimes happen to wake up
on the porches of a palace,
in the green grass of a ditch,
in the dismal loneliness of your own room,
your drunkenness gone or disappearing,
ask the wind,
the wave,
the star,
the bird,
the clock,
ask everything that flees,
everything that groans
or rolls
or sings,
everything that speaks,
ask what time it is;
and the wind,
the wave,
the star,
the bird,
the clock
will answer you:
"Time to get drunk!
Don't be martyred slaves of Time,
Get drunk!
Stay drunk!
On wine, virtue, poetry, as you like.