Monday, February 25, 2013

How are you my friend?

My silence here means I'm pretty busy in work, that I can't daydream in office or write the useless self-indulgent blog.  But I suddenly want to be lazy for a while, so I am here again to say hello to myself.

Last Friday I had a little meeting with VV, Dada and TMC, the ex-colleagues from my first job.  They are now my friends, and actually we were already friends when we were working together as colleagues.  Yes, I always make a clear division between colleagues and friends and it is something about feeling, I can't really tell the criteria of becoming friends.  Sadly after I left my first job, I could hardly make any friend with colleague anymore.  I think it is my problem, like my heart is closed.  Maybe I become more and more a misanthrope and I feel quite comfortable to be the quiet unnoticed one in work, of course so long as my boss remember to pay me every month.

Corny photo style, yeah cheers~

About that last Friday meeting, we no longer talked about the favourite pastime, the future travelling plan or the troubles in work.  We now talked of the marriage life, the consideration of having baby or not and the life of a mummy and her child..... all the talks that I could not contribute much, though I listened hard, inserted some useless comments or enquiries and my friends also tolerated my ignorance and tried to treat me as equal as them (like asked me if I would be a mother or not (huh?!) and were careful not to mention the fact that I was that "politically-incorrect but everybody including male and female like talking and laughing about" the vulgarly and criminally typical aged "leftover" female).   All my friends progress with the progress of time, while I still live in the time 10+ years ago.  Strange, I feel quite comfortable about my out-of-time out-of-space. Very unplanned, unproductive, unambitious, unsuccessful.   Clearly this is the one too poisoned by Bukowski.