useless but not hysteria

For an autistic person like me, every social interaction always results in awkwardness. A few days ago I just carelessly showed my "staff card holder" to my colleague while accessing the office, my colleague spontaneously threw me the questions of "What (the hell is that useless thing?)" and "Why (did you waste time to make it?)" and gave me a "wtf" facial expression. I could only smile embarrassingly and explained in a rather apologetic tone (without knowing why) that although it's cheap and also of a better quality to buy a proper "staff card holder" in the market, I was such an idle person and liked to make useless things, and also there's a hidden reason (cos' to spell it out would make me even more freakish) that I really like the patterns on the reverse side of envelops.


Is it really so strange? Of course it looks very plain, I could have decorated it more but I made it in a haste at night so I just folded the paper up, in fact I like it plain.


I also like to use the reversed envelop to be a book protector, given that I always read book at the pace of a turtle, my book will end in much wear and tear when I finish it.


Actually paper "staff card holder" may not be a good idea, with no lanyard and always wetted by splashing water, so i made a more proper one by adhersive tape and then pretend to be employed by hmv (oh my teenage dream).