Look back in anger

2006, what a year! With disgust and a strong urge to escape.
Let me plagiarise some words from one of my favourite bloggers in his douban, "there is nothing worse than death, except to live". I feel it at heart.
To live, is to fulfil your obligations, or
in fact, living (survival/mere existence) is your primary obligation, albeit if there is any aim or meaning to it. I don't feel suicidal, any talk of suicide is old-fashioned and cliche nowadays. Asphyxiated? definitely. "Man was born free but was everywhere in chain". who said this? Rousseau or Voltaire? That is what I learnt in my a-level History class, I think it's true.

Well, i just want to write down my most favourite cds in 2006, but turn to be a paragraph of grumbling.

1. Funfairs & Heartbreak - Special Needs
This posthumous album of the Needs is what I need this year. A bunch of perfect pop songs, blue skies and winter gardens - that what makes me carry on, still humming "I'm not afraid, to fall and fall, I asked no miracles, at the curtain call".

2. I Killed the Zeitgeist - Nicky Wire
I maybe the only person who ranks this album so high. Misanthropist and withdrawn, this is Nicky, or this is me? "Do you know you could die from a broken heart?"

3. The Eraser - Thom Yorke
Another misanthropist and withdrawn person, so? thom yorke is always like my soulmate, knows exactly what i feel. "And this is fucked up, fucked up, this your blind spot, blind spot, it should be obvious, but it's not."

4. First Impressions of Earth - The Strokes
The first dark album i got from 2006, still lingers on my player.

5. Waterloo to Anywhere - Dirty Pretty Things
I actually do not know if I think this album is that good to be my no.5, but for my personal preference for mr barat... though he always remains his gentleman's silence, i think mr. barat is quite bitchy is this album, maybe that's the reason I love it.

6. The Freedom Spark - Larrikin Love
Don't need to say much about this album, the title speaks it all. Think all the caged soul like me love this album dearly. "It's time we told the story of how the soul grows old, and how a young boy grows up in a world that's cold".

7. The Great Western - James Dean Bradfield
Yes, I love James, everyone knows.

8. We Are the Pipettes - The Pipettes
They are hyped up, untalented, dress in ridiculous polka dot...but they are fabulous. This album is kind of illumination to my boring life, how i danced in my mind when i was just jam-packed in the train and listened to Pull Shape.

9. The Secret of the Loveninjas - Loveninjas
I must have missed so much good stuff for the swedish pop music. Actually I love their EPs more, but this album is not bad, sweet and pop, thanks to Labrador.

10. Jarvis - Jarvis Cocker or
Ringleader of The Tormentors - Morrissey
Oh I can't decide.

If Bumfest sessions of Babyshambles is an official release album, of course it must be at a very top ranking... and if The Blinding is not an ep, maybe i will place it somewhere within my top 10, but.. I really hate to listen the new I Love You But You're Green.

Death of Internet

Almost the death of me, mentally
Life becomes
Void and empty
Or that is what life is.

That suddenly reminds me of the film matrix, life seems so normal and fulfilled inside the matrix, but of course the fact is just opposite.

Christmas thought

I could have been someone
Well so could anyone
You took my dreams from me
When I first found you
I kept them with me babe
I put them with my own
Can't make it all alone
I've built my dreams around you

Take me by the hand now, Waterloo to anywhere

So where the story begins
or in fact there's no beginning and no end

should i take you back to paddington

Paddington revisited, my dorm


The little garden below

or to the eternal garden of delight


112a Teedale Street, London

Take the train! Follow my own gypsie lane
this is the land where the noble spirits rest
though bleak and blizzard,
with the language I can hardly communicate
i am asking "if i can stay"

well, I was lost in this vanity and liberty


It's so bleak, so pretty


Any fool believes that love can be found at Pont-Neuf?


Lamps in front of musee du louvre


Art or luxury? musee d'orsay


I'm trying to copy a photomaster's masterpiece, with low quality


Metro Abbesses


Spining heavyhorse


I reckon these are the most romantic stairs in the world, yes, I wanted to slide down the banister if I was not that clumsy


Thousand steps for the deliverance, basilique du sacre coeur


It's so blinding


Beautiful Montmartre


That's the beginning, that's the end, anywhere in Albion

Two men, one soul

Are you still shaking out all dead wood from your bed
Live @ Brixton, London 4 December 2006

This was my third time this year to watch Dirty Pretty Things, how time and space matches each other, and of course I do like this band. Brixton was not a good venue, maybe I never like any big one. Wince not, I was compensated by the choice of songs. Glad to hear One To My Left, my most favourite b-side of dpt at the moment, and the unforgetable The Good Old Days (yes how can we forget the good old days). Gin & Milk was played extremely fast and smooth (and that's the best version I've ever heard). Lighting ciggies for Stan, you know mr barat has shaken out his dead wood, he with Stan are a perfect couple now. My only complaint (besides the venue) was, Carl didn't take off his clothes! Isn't all dpt gig a saucy indie boys strip show??! No, no disrespect here, but I must admit my liking for seeing mr. barat's naked body (albeit a bit chubby now).


That white strap looks like a bra strap

Now the wood is all dead, but you still smile like a child
Live @ Apollo Theatre, London 7 December 2006

"What's it really like now it's been a long long time since I've step outside .." Yes, it was indeed such a long time since I last saw Babyshambles. The history of mr doherty did discourage me to make any overseas booking. Call it a summons or spell (or curse), I took the risk. In fact the decision to go to uk again was all because of Babyshambles. I really miss this band (or the person to be exactly). Hate to see all tabloid news of Peter (it was a bit crazy, for my short stay in uk, I could find his news everyday in such tabloid), hate to meet all idiotic fans just love this tacky cliche of sex-drug-rockn'roll-oh-it's-so-cool, it all belittles this band and this man. My belief proves true, my loyalty pays off. Babyshambles was absolutely brilliant, yeah, they could be messy and shambolic (and it's no stranger to me, or even go absence), but when they show their true colour, all you feel is joy and bathing in the arcadian bliss (can anyone feel that i am going to be oblivious and insane now, i can't stop praising them). I am not exaggerated to say that when I saw their gig, I couldn't stop to think how their lyrics "So here comes the delivery, straight from the heart of misery" was so true and appropriate. Sorry I couldn't remember exactly the setlists, but the highlight (for me) was (it's all so predictable) sedative, you talk, fuck forever, what katie did, albion and of course time for heroes.


Great, there was only one song with The General

Sometimes I feel so strange that no matter how shambolic and druggy Babyshambles are, I still feel the joy, angelic and the childish care-free of their music, just like no matter how decent and gentle Dirty Pretty Things are (don't say clean, they are not), I still feel the demons, frustration and heaviness of their music. Two sides of the arcady.

Here I fucking go .... the albionsolution

"let's call it a day" I told myself
but my soul was caught again
in the most unprepared way
think it's the last
but back to the start